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Stat-Tasticks! July 27th, 2009

Weekly Weigh-Ins

Startling Undulations

Startling Undulations

Over the last two weeks my weight has formed something that looks a bit like a letter “W” written by a dying man.

I can’t really explain the wild dips. It may be that I’m not weighing myself at the same time every day (I’m not), or it may be that sometimes I weigh myself before eating and sometimes after. But you wouldn’t think that these factors would lead to such major differences day to day.

Foolishly I took this photo after today’s weigh in, so Monday the 27th appears on here even though it’s technically in week three. While I’m pleased to see my weight crashing below 170 today, I honestly can’t account for how it got there.

This Week’s Weight:

Monday: 176.6 pounds
Tuesday: 176.1 pounds
Wednesday: 174.4 pounds
Thursday: 173.9 pounds
Friday: 175.3 pounds
Saturday: 176.6 pounds
Sunday: 172.8 pounds
BONUS MONDAY: 169.1

What a puzzling roller coaster.

A more sober assesment

A more sober assesment

Whereas my weight was blown this way and that by the wiggles and gyrations of the scale, BMI is a stolid Yankee reacting to only the greatest shifts in weight with a gentle downward slope. While there’s no accounting Sunday and Monday’s sharp declines, it is heartening to see the line dropping toward normal as rapidly as a stock market crash.

This Week’s BMI:

Monday: 26.76
Tuesday: 26.70
Wednesday: 26.43
Thursday: 26.36
Friday: 26.56
Saturday: 26.76
Sunday: 26.20
BONUS MONDAY: 25.63

Measurements

This week’s measurements aren’t significantly different from last. It seems that if I’ve lost weight, it’s come off my butt. I’m okay with that, since my butt is extremely efficient at storing fat. My ability to do push ups, crunches, and squats has also improved. With both the crunches and the squats, I wonder if I’m doing them wrong. The number I’m able to do before my form goes to hell seems surprisingly high. My upper body is still too weak to do many push ups or complete a decent chin up. Unfortunately I don’t have a real chin up bar, so I’m using a loft bed which is less than ideal. Maybe that’s contributing to my failure, or maybe that’s just a convenient and ready excuse. Who’s to say?

This Week’s Measurements:

Height: 68″ (=)
Head: 22.5″ (=)
Neck: 15.5″ (=)
Shoulders: 44″ (=)
Chest: 36.5″ (-)
Bicep: 12″ (+)
Elbow: 11″ (+)
Wrist: 7″ (+)
Belly: 35.25″ (-)
Waist: 35.75″ (-)
Butt: 39″ (-)
Thight: 22″ (=)
Knee: 15″ (=)
Calf: 15″ (-)
Body Fat % Measured by Calipers: 22.1% (=)
Resting Heart Rate: 60 (-)
Max Push Ups: 25 (+)
Max Crunches: 110 (+)
Max Squats: 75 (+)
Max Chin Ups: 0 (=)

This Week’s Paunchy Photo!

July 27th 2009 Progress Photo - Slightly less colorful than last week!

July 27th 2009 Progress Photo - Slightly less colorful than last week!

Despite the wild ride my weight has been on these past couple of days, there isn’t much in the way of visible progress. I still have the pregnancy bump and need of training bra. When I was gaining weight I became bulbous so gradually that I didn’t notice anything was changing. It makes sense that the rate of change will be similar when losing weight. I probably need to lose a fair amount of fat before anything starts to visibly change. Still, it would have been nice if a couple of hours of waggle had translated into a completely transformed sack of me.

Wii Fit Age

If you’ve ever done one of Wii Fit’s body tests, you know that at the end of the test you are given a Wii Fit Age. The lower the age, the better. If this number was used to track your weight and activity level to form an index of your overall health, it could be very useful. Instead what it does is take your weight and your ability to stand perfectly still, and then adds to that two arbitrary tasks involving shifting your weight or standing perfectly still again.

Theoretically it’s measuring your posture, and this somehow relates to health. Practically, it’s not very useful. Nevertheless I’ve been tracking it. As you can see it is a capricious beast. But the overall trend is downward, which is apparently a good thing.

Numbers with something and nothing to do with overall health

Numbers with something and nothing to do with overall health.

Stat-Tasticks! July 13th 2009 Measurement Roundup

Howdy pardners! Today we’re gonna rustle up some measurements! Yeehaw. So getcher graduated cylinders and yer plumbobs and lets round up them significant figures. Whoooo Doggy!

I always thought that I was 5'9". I was living a lie. How is it I was able to maintain this deception for 30 years?

I always thought that I was 5'9". I was living a lie. How is it I was able to maintain this deception for 30 years?

Height

Time to drop the cow poke affectation and get down to business.

Height: 68″

First off, how is it that nobody has ever told me I’m kind of short? 5’8″? I’m not even going to include the 1/8th. That’s like adding insult to injury. Who measures things in eighths? This was a crushing blow to my self esteem, and I haven’t fully recovered. I’m dictating this from a medieval rack, hoping to remedy the situation. But while that’s going on, let’s move on to what the scale had to say.

Curse you scale. Couldn't you tell me sweet sweet lies?

Curse you scale. Couldn't you tell me sweet sweet lies?

Weight

This news isn’t much better.

Weight: 177
Body Fat %: 20
Total Body Water%: 55.9

The scale uses simple bioelectrical impedance to guesstimate body fat percentage, and the percentage of water weight. It does this by shooting electricity up through the bottoms of your feet and seeing how much your body resists the current. It’s apparently not the most accurate method. But seeing as how I don’t have a giant tank to submerge myself in, and I haven’t quite figured out the calipers yet, it’ll have to do for now. As an approximate value I’m satisfied for now, even if I’m not thrilled with the result.

Mathematical rigor and flashes of flesh to titilate and amuse.

Mathematical rigor and flashes of flesh to titillate and astound.

Everything Else!

Now for the real meat and potatoes of this post. Mmmm… meat and potatoes. Where was I? Oh, right. I measured myself here, I measured myself there, I measured this rascal everywhere! Here’s the skinny on the fatness:

Head: 22.5
Neck: 15
Shoulders: 43
Chest: 37
Bicep: 12
Elbow: 10.5
Wrist: 7
Belly: 36.5
Waist: 36
Butt: 40.5
Thigh: 22
Knee: 15.5
Calf: 15.5
Ankle: 10

There exist in nature a few golden mathematical ratios that seem to be embedded into the very fabric of life. One is the Fibonacci Sequence, which defines the Golden Spiral which we see in everything from snail shells to great works of art and architecture. My body’s design instead draws on the classic Beige Oblong, a ratio that also governs the noble pear, the stoic matryoshka doll, and the mighty Barbapapas.

Don’t believe me? Do the math! b2y2 = x3(a-x)

An updated progress photo. Not much different from the last one. Let's still call this one... "Before".

An updated progress photo. Not much different from the last one. Let's still call this one... "Before".

Yikes! What hath God wrought? Oh, it’s me. Obviously there has not been a lot of progress since last time. I guess this is a pretty good impetus to get moving.

Oh hey, I still haven’t named the food fetus that I’m carrying. Any thoughts on what the little tyke should be called?

Guess what? All of these measurements are also available for your viewing pleasure on Google Docs! You can find them all in a spreadsheet (here).